When a broken heart stops breaking

Dave asked me, "If it was anyone else, would it matter?"

I was thinking ... yeah, it'd probably matter if it was anyone else, but because it's THAT person, it doesn't matter. Not anymore. Not for a long time now.

When someone breaks your heart enough and disappoints you over and over and over, there comes a point you have to say "Enough is enough" and put a stop to allowing yourself to care so much it hurts.

I think it's a terrible thing when you stop caring - because with a broken heart, at least it means you still care. But when a broken heart ceases to break, there are no feelings left but a void for the person who broke your heart too many times to count.

I've come to terms with the reality of my reality. And accept that sometimes apologies are empty ... and promises are broken as soon as the words flow from guilty lips and aren't worth much anyway ... which bring a touch of sadness behind my controlled smiles. And I just have to learn to be okay with that.

So for a long moment in a short lifetime, my heart doesn't break anymore over this. It just ... is.